Mafia, mafiosos, mafiosas…
You have honored me with the role of The Godfather this year, this office, this interim office, from which I shall resign on January 1, 2023 12:00 AM (EST), to be replaced by another Godfather, or shall it be a Fairy Godmother, who knows?
In this, my annual State of The Mafia address, I have first of all to swear my oath of office, yet again — mi mafia es su mafia — and I, Francis, do not-so-solemly swear that I will do my utmost to uphold the long-term best interests of the mafia and its members*.* Secondly, I have good news and bad news. The good news is that the mafia has grown this year. The bad news is that the mafia has grown this year. To a good, round number, I may add - the number 100. Synchronicity, or… coincidence?
This could only have happened for one reason - traitors in our midst, breaking the cardinal rule of The Mafia: never, ever, ever… speak about the mafia! The mafia?! What mafia?! I don’t know about any mafia. Especially not this one. Especially not this Whatsapp group. Especially not the men and women and unicorns within it. Not here, not in New York, not at our famous gatherings, not our disreputable dealings, not our illegal activities, not our sordid soirées, no, definitely not, how dare you accuse me of being a mafia kingpin!!!
Just remember, if the mafia grows, it is your fault. As punishment, I sentence you to become not just my mafia, but my dear friends, for somehow like a Hydra, you keep introducing me to more and more friends, and somehow the existence of this Whatsapp group keeps leaking, and my arm keeps getting twisted… but unlike Hercules, instead of fighting it*, I’m lovin’ it.*
Anyways, that means you, the combined members of the NYC Mafia, with a few cousins in town (or in spirit) from our Los Angeles, Miami, San Francisco, Austin, Boston, Lisbon or London branches, add yet another 100 to our companionship of A Thousand Faces, which we celebrate tonight, as it concludes its seventh year, and goes into its eighth year - eight, a number best inaugurated with celebration, at The Infinity Party.
In conclusion, I say with Tennyson
So just know, in case I’m too busy dancing tonight, that this party isn’t just for me and my team, but all of my companions, so… U2 have a share in all of this.
https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0AEkzBb0mfCtaBxwUphGRh?si=6bbea67343e84d82